Starting Over

Every day we wake up and open our eyes, we have a chance to start over again. The past doesn't matter. Yesterday is gone. We have a choice: What will I do with the day in front of me?

A little over a year ago, my husband Ben and I decided we needed a restart. It had been a tough four or five years, between raising a teenager, muddling through a pandemic, and losing both of our mothers just a few months apart. After getting our daughter settled into college and her own apartment, and getting my father-in-law - who had been diagnosed with Alzheimer's - settled into a care facility, we set out to find a place to live that would give us more opportunities to be outdoors, which has long been our happy place. Houston had become unbearably hot, with temperatures in the 90's from April through October, and so we began to look outside of Texas. 

It took just one visit to Greenville, South Carolina, to decide that was where we wanted to be. If there ever was a sweet spot in our list of criteria, this was it. Mountains to the north, the ocean just a few hours to the east, plenty of good restaurants and retail stores in the city center, and plenty of country roads and small towns in the area for Ben and I to explore. 

As a former expat, I wanted an international flavor, which Greenville offered, thanks to BMW and Michelin's US headquarters being located there. With a church on virtually every corner, we figured it wouldn't be too hard to find a spiritual community; and of course, there had to be plenty of kayak-friendly water to paddle. 

Being just two hours from Atlanta meant we could get in a Braves game or eat at a Pappadeaux now and then, and another big bonus was that Greenville was only two to three hours from my sister, brother-in-law and niece in North Carolina. With all of that and temps about 10 degrees cooler than Houston - so not too hot and not too cold - it was the perfect fit!

Surprisingly, it only took two weeks of online searches to find our perfect house, located in the Greenville suburb of Greer. By around Christmastime 2023, we closed on the house, and by the middle of March 2024, we were moved. In May, we sold our Houston house and by the end of summer, Ben was able to get his parents' home in Lake Charles, Louisiana sold, ending our responsibilities for caring for properties on the Gulf Coast. We were ready to settle into our new life in the Carolinas.

I would love to say that was the end of my "starting over" story, but God had other plans for our family. On September 5, I got a frantic call from one of my daughter Jenna's best friends, saying she had been in a major car accident and was on the way to the trauma hospital in Houston. A few hours later, I was on a plane to Texas and learned that in addition to breaking her leg and ankle, Jenna's back was broken in four places and she required spinal fusion surgery. 

It's in moments of crisis that you learn just how much the investment of time into relationships pays off. I could not have made it through the day of the accident, or the following weeks of traveling back and forth to Texas while Jenna was in the hospital, without the support of my dear friends and family members. 

From prayers to phone calls and sweet notes of care, from financial gifts to help with travel expenses to hosting me at their homes, the love and support I received literally carried me through some of the hardest days of my life. The flowers, balloons and gifts sent to Jenna - as well as some in-person visits where possible - carried her through those dark days also, ever reminding her she was not alone.

I am quite certain that a big reason for Jenna's remarkable recovery from an accident her neurosurgeon said she was lucky to survive is my worldwide prayer network of friends and family. It stretches across the United States and Central America, through Europe and Asia to Australia, where I still have close friends from my childhood. 

Even the hospital nurses and my Uber drivers, who took me from my hotel to the Texas Medical Center during my first week in Houston after the accident, were praying. I didn't just need those prayers, I relied on them every day.

As of yesterday, it has been 11 weeks since Jenna's accident. She was in the hospital for over a month and then a few weeks ago, she felt strong enough to fly to South Carolina for a week-long visit. It was a good one, where she was able to rest and recuperate, enjoy the beautiful fall colors here that she doesn't get in Houston, and talk about what starting over will look like in her life. 

Because part of her hospitalization was spent in a rehab facility, where she had three hours of physical and occupational therapy each day, Jenna is walking well on her own, albeit a little slower than usual. We are hoping she follows through on her plans to move back in with her dad, Scott, once she is back on her allergy shots, and to pursue her aesthetician's license. 

As with many things in life, especially do-overs, it may not be a straight path forward. There might be zigs and zags, and unexpected twists and turns. But as long as she continues to be covered in prayer, I know Jenna will be okay. Trusting God with my only child is not always easy, but in letting go and letting Him do what He needs to do in her life, I realize I often need to just get out of the way.

Ironically, just as I need to sometimes get out of God's way in my daughter's life, sometimes I need to get out of the way in my own life as well. 

It's been 10 years since God called me to start blogging and doing devotional writing. At first, I wrote weekly in my blog for people with chronic illnesses (I had just been diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis and was grappling with the effects of that) called Spring Sight, and then I expanded into writing short devotionals called Mustard Seed Moments in Postcards, a regional magazine in southeast Texas. While I have continued to write both feature articles and Mustard Seed Moments for Postcards, I largely let Spring Sight go as my RA was brought under control. 

With our move to South Carolina and all that has happened in our family before and afterwards, I have spent time wondering if it were time to hang up my writing hat. I began painting a few years back and took up gardening this spring. Am I not I busy enough? I wondered. Plus, the other Christian writers I knew - even ones I just met in the Blue Ridge area - were book authors now. My writing seemed so trivial in comparison. 

Then I had coffee with one of my new writer friends, and what she said to me hit me like a ton of bricks.

"Can't you see how many more people you can reach with articles, essays and devotionals?"

Wow. I never thought of that before. 

I always felt there was a bigger purpose in moving to South Carolina than just getting my husband and I into a better climate. Maybe we needed more than a new place. Perhaps what I needed was a spiritual wake-up call, telling me to stop making excuses and to just do what He had called me to do. 

Today, I listened and heard more than a chastisement. I heard God's heart, which is love. I was reminded that there are people out there hurting, needing hope in a broken world. There's a desire for light in the darkness, joy in the midst of pain.  So today, with this new blog, I offer God's gift to me - my writing - as a gift to you. My hope is that it will encourage, inspire, and entertain. I'll share my crazy life adventures and what's on my heart ... and I hope you will share what's going on with as well.

There's a lot to be said about starting over, whether it's moving across the country, re-charting your course after a life-altering event, or reimagining your calling. It may feel tenuous or even scary at times, but it is often reinvigorating. With God's help, it can end up being even more than we could imagine.* 

You've heard about the ways my family and I are starting over. How about you? What new challenges and opportunities are you facing today? Have you prayed for guidance? What needs do you have that I can pray with you about today? Be encouraged! Whatever you're facing, you can go to God and He'll have your back.

*"Now to him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us..." - Ephesians 3:20